The things we learn from teevee...

Last night, the teevee (specifically, How I Met Your Mother) taught me all about Murtaugh Lists.

The Murtaugh List, named after the Lethal Weapon character, LAPD Detective Roger Murtaugh, is a list of things you're too old to do. Because throughout the series, Detective Murtaugh's catch phrase is "I'm gettin' too old for this shit!"

So I started thinking (like the rest of the blogosphere -- I never claimed this would be original) about what is on my Murtaugh List. And I came up with the following:

- Staying up past midnight when I have to be at work at 8.
- Sleeping on couches.
- Consuming any beverage described as “jungle juice.”
- Living in squalor.
- Sleeping past 9 AM (note that there are a few circumstances where it’s okay to wake up before 9 and then go back to bed to take an extended nap until noon or so – these circumstances are called “weekends.”)
- Taking my laundry to my mom’s house.
- Driving a vehicle with more than two bumper stickers. I have two on mine as of right now – one for Jay Nixon, one for Barack Obama.
- Drinking games.
- Consuming any Hostess product.
- Eating any breakfast cereal that has less than 5% fiber.
- Eating gas station cuisine.
- Playing touch football – because we all know “touch” means “full contact.”
- Horseplay of any sort.
- Most of the programming on MTV.
- Silly ringtones.
- Wearing any clothing that has a cartoon character on it (yes, this includes my Bear-Shark and Bad Graphics Ghost shirts)
- Paying money to see any movie with Vin Diesel.
- Z 107.7
- The club scene.

I posted this on Facebook (another thing that should possibly be on the lists of many individuals), and one friend -- who is 31 -- pointed out to me that this past weekend, she spent time watching the first season of Freakazoid while laying on an air mattress.

It could have been worse -- she could have spent that time watching cartoons featuring younger versions of already-established characters (think Muppet Babies, Flintstone Kids, Little Rosie, Tiny Toon Adventures, etc.)

But really, I guess age is more of a state of mind. And, as a few people pointed out, the only thing on their Murtaugh List is minors.